Sooo, where to start ……

I’m Daniel Morris and I’m a technologist based in Brisbane, Australia. I put technologist because I like tech and I’m not a fan of the terms geek & nerd, they are as overused as Cloud, IoT, and “give me back my Epi pe….”. I work for Dell as an Enterprise Storage and Data Specialist covering QLD, NT, some WA, and NZ – effectively most of ANZ.

The blog is dual purpose:

  • to educate  ‘the peeps’ (if you are reading this you are officially a peep),
  • and also as documentation in case I forget stuff.

Most of the content here will be Dell related because that’s what I am trained in and know the best. Funnily enough my most popular post still in 2015 are my three posts about CAVA for EMC Celerra/VNX File. Sadly I don’t seem to be able to top them with newer content :)

One of my goals is to create a wiki/FAQ/dump/bible for Dell Storage like @StevenPoitras has done with www.nutanixbible.com. Dell Storage doesn’t have a lot of presence on the web and social media which needs to change. Make sure you stay on my back to get this done!

As you can see I don’t give it enough love and feeding but hopefully that will change soon enough.

Confused

Why PlanetChopstick?

If I told you I would have to kill you, except I tell anyone and everyone who asks so just ignore me.

Sub Zero drink

The culprit!

About 1995 I was young and still at University in Bathurst, NSW, Australia. It was about 11pm and it was freezing cold. My mate and I had snuck a case of Sub Zero “drink” (if you can call it that) into the Family Hotel and hit it in the garden. Sub Zero is a vodka based alcopop that will blow your head off. Every new one we would sneak to the garden, get a fresh one and then ask the barman to add some red cordial because a) We were manly men and b) it was damn near undrinkable without it!

After 12 each (I was at Uni, give me a break. What about that time you had shots with that Burke kid around the corner and you got so drunk you pretended you were Margaret Thatcher for 2 days? You don’t remember it? Exactly. Hypocrite) we were a mess and headed outside. The pub was on a corner and the roundabout had the bushiest bush about waist height in the middle. “Lets jump in the bush!” I cried. We both ran across the road, jumped, and landed in the middle of the bush on our backs.

What followed next was a series of girlish screams, profanity like “gosh darn”, and “whoopsie daisy“, and basic general sobbing. It turns out the bush looked soft, but it was the exact exact opposite. Not only was every branch and twig sticking its us from all sides, the branches also had little barbs that stuck into us if we tried to move.

We were stuck.

It was middle of semester so there were still lots of people hanging around and walking past. In our lucid and obviously brilliant state we thought to make the most of it, and involve the world with our adventure. It was genius really.

My mate decided to pretend he was Indian and in a loud very poor Indian accent yelled ….. “WOULD YOU LIKE TO BUY A CARPET? IT IS VERY NICE> VERY GOOD> YOU BUY TWO!” (BTW, I know these days this is not very politically sensitive but it’s part of the story, and it still makes me laugh). Not to be outdone, in a louder, very very poor, Chinese accent I screamed “AWWWWWWW, WHO WOULD LIKE SOME CHOPSTICKS? WOULD YOU LIKE TO BUY A CHOPSTICK? AWWWWWWWW!”.

Of course we both found this to be the funniest thing that has ever happened to anyone in history so we kept it up, for another 30 minutes, out in the cold, still in the bush. I can’t tell you anything about the reactions of the people walking past but I’m sure it was nothing but respect for the two ethnic vendors selling their wares in a bush, in the middle of a roundabout, in the freezing cold, in the middle of nowhere, somewhere in Australia. :)

So that is where Chopstick part originates. Makes sense right?!?

The planet thing doesn’t need as much of a buildup. I am tall but I have always been about 10KG (22 pounds) heavier than I should have been. Young kids aren’t well known for their tact so my nickname for a long time was Planet Morris. (My other nickname was Moz, hence DanMoz).

So there is the birthplace of PlanetChopstick. Now… close your eyes and take a little time for yourself and imagine yourself off your face in a spiky bush faking a bad accent. Now open them again. Wherever you are it’s not that bad really is it?

See, I’m offering life advice too. This blog has everything.

Ministry of Funny Walks

Diet

Recently (early 2015) I managed to drop 23 kg (50 pounds) in about 6 months following a Low Carb-High Fat style diet (LCHF). I’ve been a pretty fit guy my whole life but I have always carried a bit of weight. This style of eating seems to suit me and so far I have been able to keep the weight off by not being too strict but just avoiding carbs where possible.

I did a post on how to get started here but if you have any questions please reach out to me here or no twitter. It’s not for everyone but it suits my tastes and lifestyle well (hmm, bacon).

Cheers

 

Twitter is the best was to get hold of me online but feel free to contact me via the form below.